Showing posts with label pap smears. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pap smears. Show all posts

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy 7/19/2012


Photobucket

Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy is an advice column that addresses reader’s most burning questions on sexual health/relationships. STIs, birth control, is it real or is it fic, sexual positions--you name it. There are no stupid questions, only ones that are too embarrassing to asks someone you know. If Naughty Nurse Kimpy doesn’t know the answer, she’ll find an expert who does!




DISCLAIMER:
The information and advice from Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy is for entertainment/educational purposes only and is not intended to be used as expert medical advice. It is not meant to replace the advice of your physician. All medical advice and information should be considered to be incomplete without a physical exam, which is not possible without a visit to your doctor.



Naughty Nurse Kimpy has returned from her adventuresome Comic Con escapades, ready to dig in and answer the challenging questions you left for her while she was gone. *rolls up sleeves and adjusts nursie cap*

You wrote in an earlier post that:

"Starting from age 21, most women should have Pap smears every 2 years." 

If I already had the HPV vaccine, should I still have Pap smears this early and that often? (I'm 21:))
Yes. Yes. Yes! (No, Naughty Nurse Kimpy didn’t have a multiple unicorn just now.) The fact is that the HPV vaccine covers the most common types of Human Papilloma Virus, but it doesn’t protect against all of them; there are around 40 different types of HPV. 30% of all cervical cancer cases will not be prevented from the HPV vaccine, so it’s very important that you keep getting Pap smears.

I am in a relationship with a bisexual man. I adore him and want to support him in every way possible and part of that is his desire and sometimes need to be with a man in a sexual way. I know that not all relationships with a bisexual have this "open" relationship and we have set up some ground rules, e.g., he has to tell me when he is going out with another man, when he gets home, and he has to use protection.

We do use toys to and role playing, but that can't compare and I know that sometimes you just want the real thing. The circumstances where he steps out are few and far between, but that could be because he is extremely particular and lacks opportunity.

My questions: is this sort of open relationship "normal"? How do I deal with my feelings of inadequacy this creates? Should I expect him to be monogamous? Is there anything I need to do to protect myself mentally and physically? None of our friends know about this so I don't have anyone to talk to and that can be overwhelming sometimes.

Wow, that’s a lot of stuff to deal with, to be sure. Never fear, however, because Naughty Nurse Kimpy happens to know several different couples who are bisexual, and she has a treasure trove of information and experience to share with you.

According to Dr. Kinsey’s breakthrough sex research, 15-25% of women and 33-46% of men identify as being bisexual. While Kinsey’s data wasn’t without flaws, it’s the best source of information we have to draw from. Most studies tend to focus on either heterosexuals or homosexuals exclusively. Neither fully gay nor fully straight, bisexuals often feel at odds within either of those communities.

While you’ve referred to your partner as bisexual, which is a traditional term, I’m going to use it interchangeably with polyamory. As defined by poly101, polyamory is:

the non-possessive, honest, responsible and ethical philosophy and practice of loving multiple people simultaneously. Polyamory emphasizes consciously choosing how many partners one wishes to be involved with rather than accepting social norms which dictate loving only one person at a time. Polyamory is from the root words Poly (meaning “many”) and Amour (meaning “love”); hence “many loves” or Polyamory.

You raised the pesky word normal in your question. It’s not Nurse Kimpy’s favorite, as you are most likely aware. Being in a polyamory relationship might be unusual, but as illustrated earlier, bisexuality/polyamory is on the spectrum of typical human sexual behavior. That being said, it’s not easy to find information on bisexual relationships. If you google bisexuality, you’re likely to find nothing more than a bunch of porn websites. Many people assume that bisexual means that you always have a three-way, and that’s simply not the case, which is another reason I prefer to focus on using the term polyamory. It’s more common in polyamory to have sexual encounters with either men or women, but not necessarily at the same time. There are many straight, gay, and bisexual people who choose to have a sexually active, monogamous relationship. There are also straight, gay, and bisexual people who have open relationships. While your open relationship might be out of the ordinary, there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. Remember, as long as sex is safe, consensual, and fun, it gets the Naughty Nurse Kimpy seal of approval.

The other point that Nurse Kimpy really wants to get across is that it says a lot about your character that you’re strong enough to commit to a partner who needs something more than you can provide on your own. That isn’t to say that you are somehow lacking, but you’re never going to be a man with a penis without some serious surgery first. Being in love with someone in a polyamorous relationship isn’t easy--there certainly aren’t any road maps or lists of rules about how this type of arrangement should work. You’re carving out uncharted territory, so much of what you do will simply have to be based upon your own feelings and intuition. The most important thing here is that no one gets to define your relationship besides the two--or three--of you. You have to do what makes the most sense for you, and no one has the right to judge your personal choices. Simply put, it’s none of their business. Period.

Nurse Kimpy is so pleased to know that you and your boyfriend created some important ground rules for your relationship--that is such an important thing to do. Because your sexual partner is a man who’s had sex with other men, it puts you at greater risk for a Sexually Transmitted Infection. Your insistence that he uses protection every time is wise, but Nurse Kimpy also encourages both of you to get tested for STIs every six months, to ensure that you’re truly safe. Should you expect him to be monogamous? That’s really your call. Can you accept an open relationship, similar to what you have now, in the long term? When you see yourself in the future, can you envision a future that might include more than one other person in the relationship? While you might not be having sex with your boyfriend’s other partner, their presence will still be there. If you take a deep look and decide that you cannot, then you need to make this clear to your partner up front. It does no one any good for you to attempt to commit to something that you aren’t sure you can live with. Nurse Kimpy asks you above all else to be honest with yourself; it’s the best way of avoiding hurt feelings and broken hearts.

How do you deal with any feelings of inadequacy? That’s a very good question. A lot depends upon how confident you are in the strength of your relationship. If you trust your partner, and feel confident in the love he has for you, you need to be willing to let him go temporarily, knowing he’ll come back to you. If you don’t yet have this level of trust, then it might be helpful for you to meet with a therapist who works with clients who have issues of a sexual nature. They could be very helpful in addressing these issues and helping you achieve some semblance of peace on the matter. They can also help you create strategies to protect yourself mentally and physically.

While it can be lonely and alienating to find yourself in a polyamorous relationship, it can also be extremely rewarding, too. Nurse Kimpy encourages you to reach out online; there are many communities where polyamorous individuals hang out. It’s amazing how freeing it can be to simply find a venue where you can share some of your thoughts or concerns. There’s actually a surprising number of polyamorous indivduals active in the twi fandom, many of them openly.

The lovely MsKathy--who wrote an incredible story on polyamory called The Trip Home--provided me with some wonderful online resources on polyamory:

Polyamory
Polyamory dot org
Polyamory 101

Additionally our Pervy techs found some links that specifically address your questions about feeling inadequate and how to protect yourself emotionally in this type of relationship.

How to deal with jealousyThis is a thread started by a monogamous man who has a poly partner and is asking the group for tips on how to manage his feelings of insecurity and jealousy. 

A Poly/Mono DialogThis is a real dialog between a person who self-identifies as monogamous but whose partner is polyamorous, and the author of the article.

How to Have an Open Relationship: A detailed article that tackles the nitty gritty of having an open relationship.

It really seems as though you’re asking all the right questions and doing all the right things to protect yourself, so you’ve done a lot of the hard work already. Good luck to you, and please feel free to let Nurse Kimpy know of any resources you find that she might be able to share with her readers.


Do you have a question for Naughty Nurse Kimpy? Click the banner below, fill out the form, and get your answer in the next installment of Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy.

Photobucket

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy

Photobucket

Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy is an advice column that addresses reader’s most burning questions on sexual health/relationships. STDs, birth control, is it real or is it fic, sexual positions--you name it. There are no stupid questions, only ones that are too embarrassing to ask someone you know. If Naughty Nurse Kimpy doesn’t know the answer, she’ll find an expert who does!


DISCLAIMER:


The information and advice from Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy is for entertainment/educational purposes only and is not intended to be used as expert medical advice. It is not meant to replace the advice of your physician. All medical advice and information should be considered to be incomplete without a physical exam, which is not possible without a visit to your doctor.





What are pap smears for? Do you need it if you're still a virgin? I've done stuff before, but not had penetrative sex... do I still need it?
And what about cervical cancer?


A Pap smear is a diagnostic test that checks the cervix for unhealthy cells. During a pelvic exam, your physician takes a small brush, inserts it into the opening of the cervix, and gently scrapes the surface to collect cervical cells. These cells are smeared onto a microscope slide so they can be reviewed by a lab technician, who can determine whether or not there are cellular irregularities present.

Pap smears can show if you have an infection or cervical cancer; it can even find cells that are precursors to cancer. Every woman over the age of 21 should have a Pap smear, regardless of whether or not they're sexually active. If you're having sex regularly before age 21, you should start getting Pap smears. Pap smears are the best way to diagnose and treat cervical cancer in its early stages.

Starting from age 21, most women should have Pap smears every 2 years. This should continue until you are 65, even if you've gone through menopause. When you reach age 65, you should confer with your physician about how often you need to get Pap smears. If you've had a complete hysterectomy, including removal of your cervix, you don't need to get Pap smears.

Women who have weakened immune systems (i.e., you're having chemo, you're on long term steroid use, or you've had an organ transplant), women whose mothers took Diethylstilbestrol (DES) while they were pregnant, or women with HIV) might need to get more frequent Pap smears. If you have any of those conditions, please consult with your physician about how frequently you should get Pap smears.

If caught in the early stages, cervical cancer is highly treatable. Most cervical cancers are caused by HPV (Human papillomaviruses). There are more than 100 different types of HPV; about 40 of them are transmitted sexually. Certain types of HPV cause cervical cancer. The best way to avoid contracting HPV is to practice safe sex by using condoms, and getting the vaccine Gardasil. The vaccine protects you against the four most common types of HPV that cause cervical cancer.

I'm very glad you dislike using the word strange when it comes to genitalia, but this is something I haven't heard mentioned anywhere and it's worrisome. When I've felt inside myself with my fingers, I've reached a part that feels a little like my vagina has morphed into a penis on the inside. In my reading up, I suppose it's my cervix, but, well, it's not like the end of a canal so much as if you pull the toe of a sock inside the sock. It's floppy- I can feel around it, it is moveable.

Really, should I be worried? I have no discomfort, I'm a frequent self-pleasurer and I haven't had much sexual experience with another person. My recent (and very experienced) lover was once down there with his fingers, though, and he went "Ooh, what's this random thing?" :-/. WORRYFACE


Despite the issue you have described, Naughty Nurse Kimpy stands by her stance to avoid words like "strange" and "abnormal." So, unless your cervix is actually hanging out the opening of your vagina, or dragging on the ground, I'm not going to get really worked up about it. In nature, there are so many variations in shapes and sizes of all body parts, and that can include the cervix. Look at it this way--you might just have the cervical equivalent of a really huge rack. That can't be a bad thing, right?

Structurally, the cervix is the bottom of your uterus and protrudes into your vagina. As such, it could be that your uterus just happens to protrude further into your vagina than is typical for most women. The most important piece of information you've given me is that you have no physical discomfort regarding your cervix, and that's important. Pain usually indicates that something unusual is going on, such as an infection or inflammation.

My guess is that you either have a large cervix, or some kind of benign growth, like a uterine fibroid, a polyp, or a cyst. I encourage you to consult with you physician about it. In most cases, it needs no intervention at all. For some cysts or growths, they can easily be removed by your gynecologist. Please, please, please get rid of your worryface--there is no need to be wearing it. Be proud of your hot rack. I mean, cervix. :)

Ok, I'm sure this question has been asked before but here I go...I've heard that shaving your body (be it your special place, underarms or legs) will make it grown back thicker and quicker. I shave under my arms and my legs and it seems to be ok, maybe an extra hair here or there and I've been considering starting to shave down there...Will it grown back quicker and thicker? I hope you can debunk this myth for me Naughty Nurse Kimpy!


The old adage that shaving will make your hair grow back thicker and more rapidly is nothing but an urban legend. It seems like the hair is thicker because the tip of the hair strand is blunt from having been shaved off. This can give the appearance that the strand is thicker, but it truly isn't. Does it grow back more quickly? No. The hair continues to grow back at the same rate of growth, but it seems faster because you've only removed the hair down to the surface of your skin. It takes less time for hair to emerge through the skin if it's been shaved as opposed to plucked out from the hair follicle. Think about it in the same terms that you would weed removal. If you tear off a dandelion from above ground, the root system is still intact, and the dandelion simply grows back. If you dig up the the dandelion from its roots, however, it has to start the growth process all over again, which takes a longer period of time.

When it comes to shaving your girlie bits, you need to be prepared to do maintenance more frequently than if you wax or use a hair removal cream, because you aren't removing the hair's root. You can also get more ingrown hairs if you shave versus pluck the hair from the root. I've gone back into the Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy archives for our primer on Bare Kitties 101--check it out for the skinny on how to keep your cooter bare.

What do I need to know about waxing/shaving my girly parts? Do I HAVE to get someone else to do it for me? Is there chance of infection? None of my girlfriends do it so I can't hear about their experiences but I imagine it to be utterly painful and a hassle to maintain.


1. First, please refer to the previous question for the link to bare kitties. It is very helpful.

2. No, you don't have to have someone else do it for you, but it is far easier that way. If you've ever tried to pull wax off your own kitty, you'd understand exactly what I'm talking about. It's like trying to give yourself an injection--your brain doesn't want to let you do it. Trust.

3. Whenever you play around with removing things from your skin, there is a risk of infection--that includes if you shave, pluck, or wax. Whenever you get waxed in a salon, there is a risk of infection if they use the same wax basin for more than one person. Check with the salon first about their policies regarding waxing before you choose to go there, so that you can be informed about the level of risk you face.

4. Waxing is definitely painful, and any type of cooter hair removal requires a level of commitment to maintain. Waxing will give you the longest lasting bare kitty results, but there's obviously a cost associated with that maintenance. You basically need to assess how committed you are to maintaining the bare kitty results, and go from there. The bottom line? If you find that you're fed up with keeping your kitty bare, you can always choose to let it grow back. There's no law against changing your mind, or keeping your kitty bare intermittently; you don't need to worry about the Cooter Police arriving to assess your level of bareness. Promise.

I need your advice on ingrown hairs. I've got a lot in the pubic region and they seem to never cease. It's like I can't get a moment of peace down there. I don't know if there's different classifications but they look like zits. I have scars from picking at them and it's just not a pretty sight down there. So 1. How do I stop them from happening and 2. I am insecure about anyone being down there.
PS I am a virgin so that hasn't been a problem yet.


I'm going to assume that you're getting ingrown hairs because you shave or wax your lady bits. If this assumption is incorrect, please let me know, and I can answer your question a bit differently.

An ingrown hair is one that curls back into your skin, or grows into your skin sideways. It's most commonly seen in people who have curly hair, or with pubic hair. This is frequently accompanied by an inflammation/infection of the hair follicle, which does end up looking similar to a zit.

The best way to avoid ingrown hairs is to properly prepare your skin surface before you shave. Use plenty of shaving cream, don't shave over the same surface more than once, and don't press down against your skin as you shave--you should lightly glide the razor over your skin. Also, try not to shave against the grain or direction of hair growth.

When the inevitable ingrown hairs appear, I recommend that you do several different things:

1. Exfoliate daily using a loofah or body sponge/scrubber. Avoid using any type of body wash exfoliator, as it can irritate your sensitive skin.

2. After shaving or waxing, treat the skin to a lotion designed to prevent ingrown hairs, one that includes glycolic or salicylic acid.

3. Treat all ingrown hairs with a formula designed to deal with them. Some good products include Dr. Earles Razor Bump Lotion, The Art of Shaving Night Cream, or Bliss Ingrown Eliminating Pads.

4. The most important piece of advice I can give you? DO. NOT. PICK. Ever. Your fingers are full of germs, and you'll only make your skin more irritated by picking at it. If you *must* touch it, make sure that you wash your hands first, then soften the skin and open your pores by placing a warm wash cloth over the affected area. Use a disinfected pair of tweezers to gentlyfree the hair from under the skin. Once you've liberated the hair strand, I recommend that you pluck it out with your tweezers, thus avoiding it growing back with a blunt end.

In terms of being insecure about how your lady bits look due to scarring, there are over the counter products that can help fade the scars for you. The best known remedy is Mederma.

No matter what your lady bits look like, I encourage you to get over your self-consciousness. Your quirks and differences make you who you are, a unique individual unlike anyone else. If you run across a lover who can’t appreciate those differences, scars included, then they probably aren’t the right person for you.


Do you have a question for Naughty Nurse Kimpy? Click the banner below, fill out the form, and get your answer in the next installment of Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy.

Photobucket

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy

Photobucket
Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy is an advice column that addresses reader’s most burning questions on sexual health/relationships. STDs, birth control, is it real or is it fic, sexual positions--you name it. There are no stupid questions, only ones that are too embarrassing to ask someone you know. If Naughty Nurse Kimpy doesn’t know the answer, she’ll find an expert who does!






DISCLAIMER:

The information and advice from Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy is for entertainment/educational purposes only and is not intended to be used as expert medical advice. It is not meant to replace the advice of your physician. All medical advice and information should be considered to be incomplete without a physical exam, which is not possible without a visit to your doctor.




Apparently, the subject of jilling off hasn't been closed yet. A helpful reader volunteered some hints for my virgin readers who are just learning about self love:

I love your posts, this week's especially. I know how stressful it can feel if you are just starting out on th Road to Self Love, if you catch my drift.... While I too am still a virgin, I started on this long and winding road back in high school, and never looked back! I wanted to give a suggestion to those who may be new to this gift we give ourselves. Take a relaxing warm bath or shower to de-stress, but try going further with this particular setting. Remember, tub faucets and extendable shower heads are beautiful inventions! Hope this helps, and please keep up the good work! I look forward to your post every week!
P.S.--Naughty Nurse Kimpy is blushing. Thank you.

First I want to congratulate you on this awesome column, it has proven very helpful for me. So I have, what I think is, a strange situation. I noticed that my boyfriend ejaculates and orgasms and he still keeps his hard-on. I ask him and he says that he can keep his erection through three orgasms but the third would be pretty painful. So, this is unheard of (after I noticed it I did some research but didn't come up with anything)? Is he defying the laws of hard-ons?

I'm delighted that my little blog has proven to be helpful. That's my overall goal, and it's good to know that I'm succeeding, one small question at a time.

Now, before we get to this boyfriend of yours, let me start by saying that Naughty Nurse Kimpy tends to avoid using words like "strange" when it comes to things of a sexual nature, because it's a loaded word. I put it up on the shelf with other words like "abnormal," "weird," and "broken." *tiny Naughty Nurse Kimpy uses stepstool to put "strange" up on the top shelf, out of reach*
Now that we've retired the word strange, there are other adjectives I would use when describing your boyfriend's ability. "Exceptional" comes to mind, as does "luckiest girl on the planet." Your boy is in a minority of men who are able to take a licking and keep on ticking, so to speak. Is the phenomenon unheard of? No. Is it rare? Yes. Is he defying the laws of physics? I'm not familiar with erection physics, so I cannot possibly comment on that. *giggle*

Suffice it to say, you've got something very special in your hands (and other places!); Naughty Nurse Kimpy's only advice is to have lots of enjoyable, consensual, safe sex while attempting to defy the laws of erection physiology.

I'm 22 years old and I had my first Pap smear done last week. I am not nor have I ever been sexually active. During the appointment my doctor said that I may feel a pinching or a stinging sensation once she does the actual Pap smear. I figured it was because she was breaching the hymen (is that right?). However, I didn't feel any pain whatsoever. Just a little discomfort due to the fact that I had a total stranger in between my legs, lol. Am I correct to assume that since there was no physical pain or discomfort that I lost my hymen before this exam?
Okay, we have several questions here, and I want to address them all.

1. Is the pinching/stinging sensation related to breaching the hymen? No. Although it can be uncomfortable when a gynecologist inserts a speculum into your vagina, the insertion does not generally cause a pinching or stinging sensation. Once the speculum is inserted, the gynecologist uses a vise to open it, which makes it easier for them to examine your vagina and cervix.

2. A Pap smear actually takes place on/in your cervix, which is the opening to your uterus. Your gynecologist uses a small tool that looks like an unused mascara wand and inserts it into the center of your cervix. They swirl it around a few times to work cells off the middle and upper cervix. They take this tissue sample and place it on a prepared slide using a "smear" technique. A lab technician will then stain the sample and look it over for any signs of abnormal cells, which could be cancerous or indicate the presence of some other cervical anomaly. It is this scraping technique that usually causes the most discomfort during a pelvic exam, and that’s where the pinching/stinging would come from.



3. Because you felt no pain, does it mean you already lost your hymen? Not necessarily. If your doctor is particularly adept at giving Pap smears, it's possible that you didn't feel much of anything. And trust me when I say that losing your hymen doesn't equal painless pelvic exams (right, ladies?). It could also be that you don’t have a very sensitive cervix, so you have a higher threshold for pain. Because of this, the jury is out as to whether or not your hymen is intact. However, in Naughty Nurse Kimpy's book, you're still a virgin until you have vaginal/penetrative sex. KWIM?

Scientists say that animals have a certain type of mating season or, better explain to be, a time when they are in heat. Is there a time for humans to become in heat? Does it affect to only women? Men? And can I schedule that somehow so I know when to tell my boyfriend to get off work more easily?"
While humans, pigs, and dolphins are the only mammals that have sex for reasons other than procreation, all female mammals have a reproductive cycle that allows them to become pregnant. So, do humans go into heat? We don't experience the same type of behaviors as do most mammals who go into heat, but some women do indeed become randier during ovulation. This could be due to the presence of luteinizing hormone, which is responsible for causing an egg to release from the follicles every month.The human female's reproductive cycle is ruled by hormones. During the first half of your cycle, estrogen is the Queen Bitch of the female reproductive system. During the second half, progesterone goes all Joan of Arc on estrogen, wrestling the helm away from her. During the switchover from estrogen to progesterone, however, luteinizing hormone surges, then recedes, and an egg is released as a result of this surge.

For further proof about hormonal influence on horndog tendencies? Talk to any pregnant woman around her 5-6th month. They're all about SEX, SEX, and MORE SEX, and we have hormones to thank for that.
Now, as far as getting an excuse to get your boyfriend home from work? Um, unless you are planning on having some little kidlets soon, you probably don't want to follow luteinizing hormone's siren song. You ovulate about 24-36 hours after this lady surges, so... yeah. Reproduction will occur much more readily, which is great if you want to Go Team! If not? Just ignore her, and she'll go away. Until next month, that is...

For those of you who are on oral contraceptives, or any hormonally-based contraceptive, the point is moot, because your entire system is being held in limbo via the artificial suspension of egg production. One of the reasons these contraceptives are so effective is because they stop eggs from being released at all, thus there is nothing to fertilize.

So, bottom line, do human females go into heat? No, not really. Hormones may play a role in level of overall horniness, but that's not true for everyone. End of story.


Do you have a question for Naughty Nurse Kimpy? Click the banner below, fill out the form, and get your answer in the next installment of Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy.

Photobucket

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy

Photobucket
The Naughty Nurse is an advice column that addresses reader’s most burning questions on sexual health/relationships. STDs, birth control, is it real or is it fic, sexual positions--you name it. There are no stupid questions, only ones that are too embarrassing to ask someone you know. If Naughty Nurse Kimpy doesn’t know the answer, she’ll find an expert who does!

DISCLAIMER:
The information and advice from Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy is for entertainment/educational purposes only and is not intended to be used as expert medical advice. It is not meant to replace the advice of your physician. All medical advice and information should be considered to be incomplete without a physical exam, which is not possible without a visit to your doctor.



Welcome, Pervlings, to the inaugural edition of ASK NAUGHTY NURSE KIMPY. To get the ball rolling, some of my fellow Pervs were kind enough to help me out by asking questions. Who asked the questions, you say? Here on ANNK, we maintain a strict confidentiality agreement, so all questions are answered without revealing the individual asking the question.
  1. Medically speaking, what are your thoughts on DP?

For the uninitiated, DP stands for “Double Penetration.” As in, two peens in one vag, one peen in the vag and one in the ass, or two peens in the ass. There is even such a thing as DVDA, or “Double Vaginal/Double Anal,” which starts to require some pretty amazing sexual gymnastics from each of the participants. But I digress…

First and foremost, I will always emphasize that as long as sex is consensual, what two (or three, or four, or five) individuals choose to participate in is their own business. I’m not here to judge. That being said, when you get into (twss) a situation involving anal sex, or putting several large objects into a tight place (think two peens in one vag), three words rule the day: LUBE, PREPARATION, and PROTECTION--the DP Trifecta.

If you’re doing a vag/peen DP, please, please, please make sure to use plenty of lubrication, and one that is safe to use with condoms (water-based). However, all the lube in the world isn’t going to do you an ounce of good if someone just greases you up and sticks a peen in there. EEP! HELL NO!!! Get good and warmed up before Rambo gets going, KWIM? The anus is a very sensitive area, and there are a lot of blood vessels down there. The skin can tear quite easily. You need to work your way up to it. If you’re sexually aroused beforehand, it makes all the difference in the world. Trust.

As far as DP vaginally is concerned, vaginas are anatomically amazing. Their capacity to stretch is phenomenal (as any woman who has given birth can attest). Again, however, just as you wouldn’t have sex without some lubrication, you certainly aren’t going to fit two peens in there without some preparation. Warm up the parts first. Make sure you’re good and lubed up, again using one that is safe to use with condoms. A long-lasting, water-based lube, such as Astroglide, Pjur, KY silk, or Sliquid H2O, are good choices.

Have you noticed the use of the word condom throughout this reply? That's the third word in our DP Trifecta, PROTECTION. Because the entire genital/anal region has a great deal of elasticity, you can experience micro-tears during sex that you won't even notice or see; the likelihood of tears increases when the skin is stretched more than it is used to. To viruses and bacteria, however, these micro-tears might as well be the Grand Canyon, which is how STDs get transmitted so easily. Because of that, you run a much higher risk of STDs if you choose not to use condoms.

One final note: Ass to mouth or ass to vag is not a good idea, even in the throes of passion. The intestinal tract is full of plenty of bacteria, and it is an infection waiting to happen if you choose not to clean up afterwards. Double dipping is not recommended.

Moral of the story? Once again, LUBE, PREPARATION, and PROTECTION. And dudes, run with the ball. Literally. Just remember, have FUN. That’s what it’s all about.


  1. How often do women need Pap smears? When are you supposed to get your first one? Do you still need a Pap smear if you aren’t getting shagged on the regular? If you’re a lesbian who only uses toys, would you still need to get a Pap smear?



Hmm, where to start, where to start…
  • Women should have their first Pap smear at age 21
  • If you are still in your 20s, you should have Pap smears every 2 years. Doing the math, starting at age 21, you would get them at 21, 23, 25, 27, and 29.
  • If you are 30 and older, and you’ve had three normal Pap smears in a row (i.e., your Pap smears from ages 25-29), you can start getting them every three years. If you had one abnormal smear, continue on the every two years schedule.
  • When you reach the age of 65-70, and you’ve had three normal Pap smears in a row, you can stop getting them all together. Even if you are menopausal, you still need to get a Pap smear.
  • If you’ve had a hysterectomy, but your cervix was left intact, you still need to follow the aforementioned guidelines for getting Pap smears.
  • Even if you’ve had the vaccination for HPV, the virus that causes most forms of cervical cancer, you need to follow the guidelines for Pap smears.
  • Every woman between the ages of 21 and 65, regardless of level of sexual activity, number of partners, or sexual orientation, should follow guidelines for Pap smears. In fact, research shows that many lesbians are at a higher risk for cervical cancer (due to average number of sexual partners), but tend to underutilized screening tests, thus end up having higher rates of cervical cancer.
  • Remember, these are guidelines in the United States. If you do not live here, chances are your country’s guidelines may differ from these. No matter what, I always recommend that you follow your physician’s advice above all else.

  1. I want to get my nips pierced but am daunted by going to the gyno or getting a mammogram w/them. How do women who look non-adventurous on the outside deal with revealing something that is not the norm in our society at the doctor’s office?

  • The jury is still out on whether or not it is acceptable to wear nipple piercings during a mammogram, but my guess is that most providers would prefer that you take them out for the procedure. Most piercing shops I’ve queried will tell you it’s fine to leave them in. I would simply ask your provider beforehand so that you are properly prepared. Some piercing parlors will substitute a plastic insert into the hole to keep it open during your mammogram. Nipple piercings have a tendency to close up quickly if there is no place holder left in it.
  • Another good thing to know about nipple piercings is that it shouldn’t interfere with your plans to breastfeed. Many women leave their piercings in while pregnant. When breastfeeding, milk can sometimes leak out of the pierced site, but aside from that, breastfeeding and pierced nipples go together just fine.
  • Finally, as far as looking vanilla on the outside, but dangerous sex kitten the minute your clothes are off? Any good medical professional won’t bat an eye when they see a genital piercing. If you choose to be inked or pierced, it is your personal choice, and no one has the right to make you feel badly about it, especially not a doctor. If you are unhappy with a physician’s reaction, call them out. Remind them that your personal choice to become pierced has nothing to do with their medical exam of your body. ‘Nuff said.

Do you have a question for Naughty Nurse Kimpy? Click the banner below, fill out the form, and get your answer in the next installment of Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy.

Photobucket