Tuesday, October 5, 2010

The Lemon Report 10/5/10

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The Lemon Report - Fancy finding out what is on the FF bookshelves of the Pervy Girls of the PPSS? The lemon report lets you know our personal favourite updates of the week, and why you should give the fic a try.... It’s a great place to trawl for new recc’s and don’t forget to share your favourite update with us by leaving us a comment.






(AH, WIP, 14 chapters, Ed/Bella)
My mind is trapped in circles, my loneliness pressing in. Unable to speak, I reach for her spark. In her eyes, I find my partner. In her command, I find my freedom. Together, we open our lives to something more.

Chele - This is a love story about Edward and Bella who find in each other the perfect match. We get a voyeur’s eye view as they explore their proclivities for dominance and submission in their delicate new relationship. The characters are strong, and the intimacy is intense and very well-written. Dominant Bella makes me want to say, “Yes, Mistress, anything you want.”

Emmy - Again I have waxed lyrical on this one when it was a full PPSS pick. But each chapter it just gets better and better. The intensity between these two is HEARTBREAKING. Her EPOV is pitched perfectly and we feel every emotion with him, whether it be heartbreak, hope, acceptance or the burning pull of pure carnal lust.



by SydneyAlice
(AH, O/S, Ed/Bella)
"I was caught somewhere between a woman and a child. One restless summer we found love growing wild."

Emmy - I just read this today I think? Its a beautiful bitter-sweet tale of love lost and found. An evocative B/E fic where Bella loses her innocence and her heart in a summer’s meadow with Edward - her father’s stable hand.





by TuesdayMidnight
(AH, Slash, WIP, 17 chapters, Jasper/Edward)
Jasper Hale hates his high school rival Edward Cullen with a passion. What happens when Jasper discovers Edward's little secret? Spank!Fic. AH/AU/OOC. Rated M. Contains mature content.

Jeanne - This story just gets better and better, the deeper we get into Jasper and Edward’s complex relationship. What started as a PWP has now become one of my all time favorite examples of how sex can be for the sake of character development. Fabulous writing, and characterizations aside, I just plain LOVE this story. Jasper and Edward are so raw (smirk) and real in their interactions. They show that sexuality is such an integral part of who we are as human beings. GAH! TuesdayMidnight owns my ass with this fic.

Emmy - Gah Jeanne - I too adore this. I know I wax lyrical on this fic when it was a full PPSS pick, but seriously it gets better and better each update. **whispers - I actually like this Jasper** Seriously the emotional connection that is being woven between these two HOT-TO-TROT boys is owning my heart & slaying my soul - oh & making me girlie parts sing....

Jennifer - The emotional attachment between Jasper and Edward is really starting to sizzle, though neither boy realizes it. I am surprised to find myself saying that I’m about as turned on by watching the boys’ relationship change as I am by the spanking and fucking--and that’s pretty damn turned on.

Jess - There are no words for how much I love this story. I could go on forever over how much I love watching these two boys grow together and as individuals. TuesdayMidnight has turned this into one of my faves, and I literally drop pretty much everything to read it!



by mjinaspen
(AH, Complete, 11 chapters, Ed/Leah)
"I need a ride. She's throwing baked goods." Sometimes personal growth is the best HEA. Take a few peeks into the volatile, passionate, and occasionally sweet love affair between Edward Cullen and Leah Clearwater.

Jeanne - Mjinaspen just posted the last chapter of this heart-wrenching, beautiful, and realistic story. I already loved the idea of Edward and Leah as a couple before I started reading HotD, but this story helped me fall in love with Edward and Leah as human beings. Now that it has ended I feel a mixture of satisfaction and longing. It’s a good feeling, in fact, it’s kind of freeing. I cannot recommend this story enough. Stories like this change you forever.

Jennifer - I read the last chapter of HotD just a few hours ago. I haven’t been able to think straight since. This is a bold, brave, and beautiful story that deserves the attention of the fandom at large, and not just a handful of non-canon lovers. Give it a try, you won’t be disappointed.



by Rochelle Allison
(AH, WIP, 6 chapters, Ed/Bella)
High School Fictional. No one sends Bella into a tailspin quite like Edward Cullen... but can she make him hers? The ups and downs and all arounds.

Teal - Have you heard that B.O.B. song “Magic”? I love the line where Rivers Cuomo sings, “I’ve got the magic in me. Every time I touch that track it turns into gold. Everybody knows I’ve got the magic...” That’s how I feel about everything Rochelle Allison writes. This high school fic makes me flail so hard, and the lemon-squeeze of this chapter was a dry hump that had me squeeing...loudly. For fuck’s sake, Bella is in her pajamas & Edward opens his jeans just enough to make said dry hump really fucking good. *died and iz ded*

Emmy - OMFG! Teal I am soooo in love with this fic too. It squeezes my heart with every update.... But I am well feart that as Edward gets older he’s gonna break B’s heart... **sad panda**



by fngrcufs
(AH, WIP, 4 chapters, Poly F/F/M, Characters not listed)
There was love. New love, old love, perfect love, imperfect love, too much love, not enough love, lost love. A love story that didn't end but couldn't last.

Jennifer - I’m eternally grateful to the person who tweeted about a new polyamory story a few weeks ago. This is a f/f/m story; I won’t tell you who makes up this delicious pairing because the players are not introduced until the second chapter. This is the story of an established couple who brings a third into their relationship. The sexing is steamy, and is definitely on my ‘fic I wish was my life’ list.

Jeanne - I’m not even reading this yet, but Jen’s rec, and the fact that I’m a h00r for poly fic, I am sold. I also took a peek at the characters, and my pants nearly exploded. *runs off to hump this new fic*



by MissBettySmith
(AH, WIP, 8 chapters, Ed/Bella)
When his high school love becomes a White House Press Secretary, BBC reporter, Edward Cullen, pursues Bella Swan once again. Heartbreak, time & their jobs are between them, but they have a bond forged from grief & comfort. A love story in 2 parts.

Kimpy - MissBettySmith’s lovely British Edward is my latest obsession. His father (Carlisle) is studying snails in the Washington Peninsula. Bella and Edward fall in love, but he’s only in Washington for 12 months. They meet up again later in life, but a huge fissure has grown between them. The thing I love the most about Betty’s stories is not only that they are smart, well researched, and well written--they’re genuinely interesting--but OMG, this lady knows how to do UST. Bella and Edward have only gone as far as heavy snogging, and damn, it is muy caliente. It is very angsty at the mo, but Betty PROMISES there will be an HEA. My wussperv heart, along with my 12YO boy horndog brain, is appeased.



by PhoenixRising25
(AU, WIP, 16 chapters, Ed/Bella)
Bella Swan needs something to put on her college applications, so she signs up to volunteer at Forks General Hospital. There, she meets Edward, a young man with a complicated past.

Kitty - Bella is looking for something to put on her college applications so she volunteers at Forks General Hospital. She meets Edward when she’s assigned to the mental ward, a patient that refuses to interact because he believes he’s a vampire...or is he really what he claims to be? So different and so gripping with the feelings she has for this troubled boy.







by belladonna1472
(AH, WIP, 22 chapters, Ed/Bella)
Edward Cullen and Isabella Swan both have parents who are powerful on Capitol Hill. Problem is, their families are political enemies. What happens when Democrat Edward and Republican Bella bump into each other at Union Station in D.C.?

Trin - I’m a sucker for good banter, but good political banter during sex... I’m dead. I also enjoy the forbidden love aspect and a good cocky Edward too. This last chapter had a lovey lemon that made me fist-pump in the air when I was done.

Jennifer - I adore a fic that can make me laugh, and The Cullen Campaign does that often. I love it all--the banter, Edward and Bella’s intense attraction, a wonderfully zany Alice and her husband Jacob. I cannot wait to read this current chapter because things were getting serious last time.

Jess - There is nothing like sexy political banter, and Belladonna does this like no one I’ve ever seen. She has managed to make legalese and polisci super sexy. Watching the forbidden love affair between Edward and Bella is like... well, just read it and see for yourself.



by Suzie55
(AH, WIP, 14 chapters, Ed/Bella)
During a summer long stay in Hawaii, Bella meets Edward, letting her inhibitions go. With other options on the horizon, she eventually has to decide between her heart's desires and her head's logic.

Jess - This story is chock full of lemons and all kinds of yummy goodness. I love the ocean. I love hot weather and hot boys in board shorts carrying surf boards. Surferward makes me swoon when he’s not being an ass, and this Bella is strong and independent. I even like Jake and Rose (no, they’re not together) in this story. We’ve hit some rough waves as of late... but it looks like the tide’s about to turn!

Friday, October 1, 2010

The Perv Pack's Smut Shack 2.0

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The Twilight Fandom has changed and evolved a lot since we started The Perv Pack’s Smut Shack. Naturally, it is important for the PPSS to evolve as well. THE PERV PACK’S SMUT SHACK 2.0. is therefore born.

We’re adding a fabulous new look, gorgeous new Pervs, and ah-mazing new features. We’ve created a Mission Statement that clearly communicates our new focus:

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Rest assured that your PPSS Pervs are still completely committed to providing you with the 411 on all the delicious smut the Fandom has to offer. Have fun exploring our site’s new look, meeting all the Pervs--old and new--and keep checking back to see all our wonderful new features, created just for you. We LOVE to hear from our pervy pervlings--please leave us your comments, tweets and emails. We want to know what you think! We look forward to serving you--hard and repeatedly.



Check out the New Pervs and our New Features:


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New Features

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PPSS 2.0 Pick of the Month - Every month we are going to hit you with what we think is an unmissable fanfic. It will be a story that either makes us think or shows us a really good time. A story that is either off the Richter scale in terms of trembles or is killing us with the burn of UST. But rest assured our PPSS pick of the month will be a great read.

Pervy Picinspiration - You might have noticed that Emmy’s Foreign Flavour and Lingerie Drawers are no longer in the sidebar. We know how you dirty girls and boys enjoyed these visual treat so we are turning them into an interactive feature instead.

Emmy wants your words. (amongst other things...) Every week Emmy will post a pic or 2 - containing phwoarrrr-worthy blokes from across the seas, some hunks from closer to home and sometimes some dangerously delish knickers and lingerie. What do we want from you in return? Well...... We want you to be inspired by these pics and to leave Emmy a delish drabble or longer story inspired by the pic(s).

Leave your story offering* in the comments section and, if you want to, post it to your FF account (pm the link to Emmy at http://www.fanfiction.net/~pippapear) mentioning the PPSS, by the following Wednesday. Each Friday Emmy will reveal her fave (entirely personal & subjective opinions belonging to Emmy) and at the same time post the next pervy picspiration for your pleasure. Non-Canon writers don’t despair - Emmy might be tragically WussPerv©, but there are plenty of equal opportunity pervs in the pack longing to read those if Emmy turp’s out.

Emmy is DYING to see what dirty delights you are going to come up with...

*Please make sure your story offering is in line with our mission statement

Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy - The Naughty Nurse is an advice column that addresses reader’s most burning questions on sexual health/relationships. STDs, birth control, is it real or is it fic, sexual positions--you name it. There are no stupid questions, only ones that are too embarrassing to ask someone you know. If she doesn’t know the answer, she’ll find an expert who does!

Going Deep - The Equal Opportunity Whores, Chele and Teal, are going to explore some of the naughtier and more unusual trends, kinks, and pairings in the Twific universe. We’ll be discussing what intrigues us, why it’s sexy, and where we can find it. As upstanding members of Team Anything Goes, you can expect the unexpected.

Talk Nerdy To Me- Trin will be bringing you a taste of geeky goodness. It might be a fic recommendation that showcases a deliciously nerdy character or just some good NerdPr0n for y’all to enjoy. Rest assured whatever it is it will be hot, since we all know nerds do it better.

Tit for Tat - We love smut. We love boobs. But we also care about you and your well-being in every aspect of your life, not just the fic world. So come have some fun with ta-tas, then stick around and join us as we have fun exploring health and wellness topics that are relevant to all of us.

The Slash Brigade -
Now it's time for Team Slash to have a go and give you a reach around. We love the man-love and enjoy a little girl on girl on the side. The Pervs of The Slash Brigade are Jeanne aka einfach mich , Chele aka Chele681 , Kim aka Kimpy0464 , Teal aka SweetDulcinea , and Jennifer aka mycrookedsmile. Dry-Humps, Reacharounds, Sixty-nines and From Behinds. You want them, we’ve got them. Our mission is to share with you our best finds from the world of m/m and f/f pairings.

Team WussPerv - Team Wussperv, this team is made up of myself, Emmy aka Pippapear, Jess aka Jessypt, Kim aka kimpy0464 & Trin aka TFX or NaughtySparkle. I'm sure you're wondering what the fuck is a wussperv right? A wussperv is someone that is...

A) Tragically canon
B) Loathes angst (when in massive doses)
C) Loves smut
D) Needs a Happy-Ever-After

We love to read new fluffy recc’s. :) Please feel free to let us know your favourite WussPerv friendly fic. It might be Team WussPervs next recc!


Team Anything Goes -
Team Anything Goes" is just as it sounds. Meet the wanton women of Team Anything Goes: Jeanne aka einfach mich , Chele aka Chele681 , Teal aka SweetDulcinea , and Jennifer aka mycrookedsmile. Our name speaks for itself: Anything Goes; and we do mean anything.

A) All Subjects (Just write it well and we’ll believe it)
B) All Categories (We’ve been known to love some angst)
C) All Pairings: (Ed/Leah, Emmett/Angela, Jacob/Edward, Roseward, Jella, Jasper/Esme)
You name it, we’ll ‘ship it.

The Lemon Report - Fancy finding out what is on the FF bookshelves of the Pervy Girls of the PPSS? The lemon report lets you know our personal favorite updates of the week, and why you should give the fic a try.... It’s a great place to trawl for new recc’s and don’t forget to share your favorite update with us by leaving us a comment.

COCKtails and Other Culinary Delights - Who doesn’t love a good COCKtail or a decadent sweet treat? COCKtails and Other Culinary Delights is a special feature full of fabulously pervy recipes and how-tos for COCKtails, sweet treats, and other food-related pleasures. We’ll have all sorts of smuttastic ideas for a girl’s night out on the town or a “quiet” evening at home.