Summary: Distortion, deviation, wandering. For centuries, Carlisle held fast to the plan he was sure had been laid out for him by a force much more divine than himself. After he takes Edward for a companion, the direction of his path becomes skewed.
shoefreak37’s Aberration answers that puzzling questions and fills in the missing gaps, proving the rich back story of Edward before the change, his and Carlisle’s early years together, the arrival of Esme, Edward’s rebellion, to his marriage to Bella. It’s a canon story, impeccably written and beautifully told.
The story opens on Edward’s wedding day, so we know from the start how it will end— not with Carlisle and Edward but with Edward and Bella. Nevertheless, even though you go in knowing it’s canon, knowing Edward’s going to somehow end up with Bella at the altar, you’re rooting for Carlisle and Edward the entire way through. They love each other SO MUCH.
Carlisle is, of course, constrained by his faith—always striving to do what’s right, his heart and body yearning for what his religion and upbringing tell him is sinful. His struggles are painful to watch, and the effect they have on Edward, who loves with a youthful ardor, is heartbreaking.
I can’t talk about this fic without talking about gorgeous writing. shoefreak37 is, in my opinion, one of the most talented writers in the fandom. Her descriptions are vivid and detailed. You see the story, and you’ll feel it. Her depiction of Edward’s change is the best I’ve ever read.
…he attempted to see himself in that tub full of ice, but that soon turned to boiling water, cooking Edward as he swore he could smell his flesh being boiled, scalded and cooked like the chicken he used to enjoy eating. And when he made one last attempt to focus on soothing thoughts, he saw himself pressing his face against the cool metal of the lamp post, only to find it hot as an iron, the over-heated metal sticking to his cheeks. Nothing helped.Absolutely nothing. So he screamed and screamed, his voice seeming to grow stronger with each exclamation, every curse.Likewise, the passion is just as exquisitely drawn. Here, Carlisle is simply imagining kissing Edward:
The thought-Carlisle moved his sinful lips to Edward's ear. "How could I not want you?" he whispered, the heat of his words warming Edward's face even in imaginings. Then his mouth moved to Edward's, hesitating, lips open, brushing against Edward's trembling lips. Several moments he stayed there, until Edward took the initiative. The kiss Edward delivered in Carlisle's musings was profane and beautiful, shattering and completing. Carlisle returned it whole-heartedly, taking the younger man's lower lip between his. When Carlisle's tongue found its way into Edward's mouth, he heard a quartet of satisfied moans, echoing in his head and in his ears.Aberration will move you. It will make your heart ache and it will make you bleed. You’ll think about it long after it’s over. This is the Carlisle/Edward story I was always looking for. It remains for me, a “must read” and one of the best stories in the Twilight fandom.
I kind of like to think that this review belongs to both The Slash Brigade and Team Angst. Aberration will rip your heart out and dance on it all while making you see that Carlisle & Edward should be the OTP of Twilight slash.
If you’ve never read any of shoefreak37’s work, you’re in for a real treat. Her writing is amazing. In this story in particular, the characterizations and plot are so very canon. It makes the hurt and the longing just come alive.
When I read the prologue when it was first posted, all I could think was, this is gonna hurt. Re-reading the prologue today, I think that it could stand on its own as a super angsty oneshot. Luckily for us, shoefreak37 didn’t stop there. We see Edward's change and acclimatization to his new existence and talent. We hear Carlisle struggle with his feelings for Edward as they change from that of a father figure or mentor to those of someone yearning for a mate.
Carlisle not only denies himself the chance to share his feelings with Edward, he tries with all his might to not even <i>think</i> of Edward in a romantic or sexual way. He's so very canon Carlisle here, with the religious lessons his father taught him forever seared on his soul. As Carlisle tries to suppress his feelings the UST goes up and up and up.
Dear God, please, let him come closer. Please, forgive me, but please, bring him closer, Carlisle thought, lips parted as the heat within him tried to escape, his breath coming out in hot, sharp pants.
Edward's tongue sneaked out from his pink mouth, and in an innocent way that was immensely sinful, he moved it across his lips, leaving them moist as flower petals on a spring morning. Carlisle groaned and tightly shut his eyes.
"I don't know if God is listening," Edward said, "but I am."
Then Edward pressed his wicked lips against Carlisle's.
Edward goes from being curious about the hints of Carlisle's thoughts to realizing that he does not want Carlisle to be a father figure. He reads the Bible to try to figure out what Carlisle's objection to loving Edward is. They have some amazing, heart wrenching, frustrating talks, where Edward does his damnedest to convince Carlisle; I know I wanted to, regularly.
Aberration is exquisitely painful, which is just how angst should be. It's not manufactured angst--the story is completely plausible as pre-Twilight canon. Carlisle and Edward's desire for one another is intense and palpable--I can't imagine not physically aching while you read this. This is not a chock-full of lemons kind of story. The rare intimate moments that Carlisle and Edward do share are made all the more delicious because of the way the intensity of their feelings for one another are pitted against Carlisle's belief that to love Edward would be morally wrong.
I could go on and on as there's no end to the feelings I have for Aberration. This is not a WussPerv safe kind of slash story, but I urge you to give it a chance. shoefreak37 has a way with words, and it would be a shame to miss out on them.
No matter how fond the fandom is of Edward/Jasper fics, Carlisle and Edward will always be the original slash pairing to me (other than Jasper/Peter of course!). It's canon, ya'll!
I must admit, even amongst all the heart-achy moments, there is so much sweetness in the way these men regard one another...especially when Edward calms and really sees Carlisle (or should I says hears).
The man he followed was good; his thoughts screamed sincerity and steadfast belief in the things he told Edward. It was because of the purity of his thoughts that Edward trusted him; well, trusted him as much as a newborn vampire can trust anyone.
The way it all unfolds is really quite brilliant with a natural development that truly feels like it could be slipped into the unwritten background years after Edward's change and the years they spent together. Even Edward's reactions and understanding of Bella later on fits so perfectly. He loves her, truly, and he knows she is what he needs, though a piece of his heart belongs to Carlisle and always will. He grows to understand her connection to Jacob and doesn't resent her for loving him; they are the same that way.
I adore this story because it is a wonderful and beautifully written AU, and it gives us a taste of could-have-been canon with characters we love.
This is not slash for the sake of smut, but a story of trust, friendship, love, and how the heart reacts when we cannot have what we desire. An absolute gem.