Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy 1-5-2012

Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy is an advice column that addresses reader’s most burning questionson sexual health/relationships. STIs, birth control, is it real or is it fic, sexual positions--you nameit. There are no stupid questions, only ones that are too embarrassing to ask someone you know. IfNaughty Nurse Kimpy doesn’t know the answer, she’ll find an expert who does!

DISCLAIMER:The information and advice from Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy is for entertainment/educationalpurposes only and is not intended to be used as expert medical advice. It is not meant to replace theadvice of your physician. All medical advice and information should be considered to beincomplete without a physical exam, which is not possible without a visit to yourdoctor.

NNK, you are a true gift to the fandom - thank you so much for all of the advice and wisdom you dispense. I'm not sure you've mentioned it specifically, so I wanted to give a piece of advice to any virgins out there who are planning on becoming sexually active. After penetrative sex, always always ALWAYS get up and go to pee.

It may be inconvenient, seem unromantic in the heat of the moment - but dear god, can it spare you a lot of pain.

Urinary tract infections (UTIs) are a bitch. And I can't think of any of my female friends with whom I've discussed this, who were warned beforehand - when you start having sex, and have various fluids and friction going on in and around the vulva - this is the perfect way for UTIs to start. If you get up to pee, even if you don't produce much, you clear the urethra of any thing that might have been introduced to the area - this is key! Please help me spare many women the pain that so many of us have gone through, which we had to learn through trial and error and repeated trips to the doctor! In fact, I recently spoke to a friend who is a doctor at a local university student health center about this, and she laughed. She told me that even before asking, the doctors know who has recently started having sex by the UTI symptoms they are coming in to get antibiotics for!Love your column, and you!

First of all, stop making me blush! I’m delighted to be able to provide useful information. Second, thank you for bringing this forward. It’s a very important step in helping to avoid painful UTIs. Hopefully, we can save a few people from experiencing that problem. Thanks for your info!

I have to say I love your postings and I look forward into meeting them every week!

I just had my second baby 2 months ago and am starting birth control. I used to use the patch method before quitting upon deciding to have another baby. I knew my options were limited seeing I am breastfeeding and have had a question about the use of Mirena. I know alot of women use this method and have shorter, or non-existent, periods. My question is: When having sex, does the male partner feel it while inside the woman?

Thank you for being a loyal reader; I really appreciate that. As for using Mirena... it’s a great method of birth control for someone like you, since you have a long-term, monogamous partner and you’ve already had several children. Most gynecologists would steer you toward that IUD as a birth control option.

As you are probably aware, the T-shaped IUD is inserted into your uterus. It contains two small threads at the bottom, which is how you can ensure it’s in place, and how your provider removes it. The threads shouldn’t hang outside of your cervix, but you should be able to feel it if you insert your finger into the cervical opening. Likewise, your partner shouldn’t be able to feel the threads during sex, but it is a possibility. Feel free to as your gynecologist about the threads when you’re discussing the IUD, and she’ll be able to give you a good idea of how common that is based on her patients’ experiences.

can you recommend an educational site to use for learning about different positions? i looked through the NNK subject directory, but didn't see anything. I'm a bit hesitant to go searching, as i don't want trauma-inducing porn or sites with viruses. diagrams/drawings are great, not necessarily photos. thanks so much.

Never fear, Naughty Nurse Kimpy is here! And boy, you should see the Google search history on her laptop! *blushes again* She’ll always take one for the team when it comes to researching sex--it’s a tough, tough job, but someone has to do it.

One of my favorite sites is World Sexual Positions Museum. A French sculptor made a collection of 20 statues that show different Kama Sutra positions. You can see the images in 3D, and it’s very professional and well done. Nothing scary or traumatic there, I promise!

At Sexual Positions Guide, you can see actual couples in different sexual positions. They break it down into categories, like “side-by-side” and “woman on top.” And, as an added bonus, they even have anal sex positions, too. The categories make it easy to find what you’re looking for, and each position comes with detailed information about its use. While they use real photos of couples having sex, they’re very tastefully presented. There are a lot of ads on this website, however, and that could be a detraction for you.

Trust Cosmopolitan magazine to have some great graphics for sexual positions, too. Not only do they show some great positions, but there’s also a bunch of other fun, sexually-related content that’s easily accessible and safe. Well, safe for your computer, anyhow. *wink*

I've been dating this guy for awhile now and we've had sex a handful of times. The problem is, his cock is on the smaller side of average. I really like him and I want to be able to climax with him during intercourse, but his size has made positions which would usually cause me to orgasm, such as doggy style, very difficult. Are there any positions or tips you can recommend that would accommodate his size and make it possible for me to orgasm during sex?

Naughty Nurse Kimpy is *so* glad you asked this question! There are so many hangups over the size of male endowment--I mean, just look at Twilight fanfiction, for heaven’s sake. Edward’s penis is always long, thick, and hard, hard, hard. In reality, this picture is simply not accurate. As is true for vaginas, penises come in all shapes and sizes (yes, pun intended). Even if a guy’s penis is on the small end of the size range, he can still bring you a lot of pleasure. As you mentioned, some positions make it more of a challenge, but that doesn’t mean you won’t ever get off with your guy.

According to, “the right combination of foreplay and stimulation can make a woman worship a small penis just as readily as a large one.” A-MEN. They suggest a variety of positions, so it’s a great resource to check into.

In general, positions that allow for deep penetration are your best bet. Using a variation on missionary position by putting a pillow under your hips and putting your legs on his shoulders is a good one to try. If you want to be on top, try gyrating your hips around in circles instead of using an up and down approach.

One other idea? Get yourselves really wound up with foreplay. Maybe even try to get in an orgasm before you have sex, since you may not always get an O from intercourse alone. Don’t be shy about stimulating yourself during sex, or bringing toys into the mix. There are plenty of ways to get off--for both of you--aside from the old in-out, in-out.

Dear nurse Kimpy,I may have an odd question. For several week now I have been having really itchy nipples. I have not been using any new body product or different clothing material.They just started to itch like grazy. It's not all the time, but it happens pretty often during work or when when I'm taking to someone that I get the urge to scratch them ( I try not to). I should probably mention that they look pretty normal there is no discoloration or swelling. Is this something that is common?

Should i go to the doctor? I hope you can answer my questions.

thanks in advance!! XO

Hmm. This is a tough one, especially since it happened suddenly, and not in relation to using any kind of new product on your skin.

The skin covering the nipples consists of tissue that is very different from the type of skin that covers the breast. Because of that, it is more susceptible to irritation or dryness. Since you mentioned that your nipples don’t appear to be dry, and there has been no discoloration or swelling present, it seems like that probably isn’t your issue. However, you can use a gentle, soothing cream on your nipples to see if it helps. Try something without perfumes or dyes--Cetaphil cream or Aquaphor are great choices. You can also try an anti-itch formula, such as hydrocortisone cream, to see if it gives you any relief.

I also encourage you to follow up with your doctor or gynecologist about this issue, just to make sure there isn’t a medical reason for your itch.

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