Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy

The Naughty Nurse is an advice column that addresses reader’s most burning questions on sexual health/relationships. STDs, birth control, is it real or is it fic, sexual positions--you name it. There are no stupid questions, only ones that are too embarrassing to ask someone you know. If Naughty Nurse Kimpy doesn’t know the answer, she’ll find an expert who does!

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DISCLAIMER:

The information and advice from Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy is for entertainment/educational purposes only and is not intended to be used as expert medical advice. It is not meant to replace the advice of your physician. All medical advice and information should be considered to be incomplete without a physical exam, which is not possible without a visit to your doctor.

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I continue to be blown away by the incredible questions you are asking. Thank you for entrusting me with them. Because I have gotten so many great questions, we're going to start posting every week when we are able!

One of my readers, Missus Robinson, had some feedback on last week's question about anal sex. I'm including it here as a general FYI. Consider it another implement to add to your bag of... tricks.

I just wanted to add a little note to your anal sex post. I used to hate anal sex. It didn't matter how much warm up I had or how gentle my husband was, it hurt. It wasn't until I did some anal play on my own with a very great toy called the slim line that I was hooked. It managed to hit my G-spot through the anal wall and I had a mind blowing orgasm while I stroked my clit. I had my husband start inserting his fingers inside of my anus, pushing up towards my belly button and stroking my G-spot indirectly. It's very subtle but oh, so yummy. I am now addicted to anal sex and have found it extremely pleasurable. I have found anal beads to be a fun anal sex toy as well, although it doesn't hit the G-spot everytime.

Vibrators placed at the opening or inserted just at the tip help to relax the sphincter as well. I love using the Hitachi Magic Wand to loosen everything up at the anal opening.

Just thought I would throw my two cents in there to help any woman who doesn't enjoy it currently but really wishes she could. I used to only have anal sex for special occassions for my husband. Now I beg him to do it and he loves it!

Now, for this weeks inquiries:

Is is really ok to swallow cum? No side effects or something? I heard from someone I don't know if is it true that jizz is some some sort of vitamin?

As far as the side effects of swallowing cum are concerned... as long as your partner has no STDs, it really is okay to swallow. There are no other side effects you will experience.

Ejaculate, also lovingly referred to as "cum," is about 90% water. 65% of cum contains semen from the seminal vessicles, and 35% comes (literally!) from the prostate. In fact, it is semen from the prostate that give jizz it's own signature smell and taste. That leaves 5% of "other fluids," which come (again, literally) from more than seven different structures within the penis and testicles. Cum doesn't have many calories to speak of. It does, however, have a significant concentration of nutrients like potassium, zinc, fructose, and citric acid (vitamin C). Needless to say, there isn't enough there for you to use jizz in lieu of a daily multi-vitamin. There is also some protein, but its nutritional benefits are minimal.

I cannot emphasize enough, though, that you CAN get STDs from swallowing cum. There is such a thing as gonorrhea of the throat, for example. HIV is also readily transmissible via genital to oral contact. Please keep those things in mind when you ponder having oral sex. The only way to do it safely is to use a condom with a male partner, or a dental dam with a female partner.

So as women get aroused, there's arousal fluid that gets you all lubed up. But after you have an orgasm, there's a TON of fluid. What is it and why does it happen?

There are three stages in female sexual response: Unaroused, Excitement, and Orgasm. During the Excitement stage, your vagina (AKA pussy) and labia (AKA lower lips) become engorged with blood, which is pretty much the same mechanism that happens in guys to make their cock hard. It's this rush of blood to the pussy that causes a gland on either side of the vaginal opening to secrete lubrication (it's technically called Bartholin's glands. IDK what exactly Bartholin did to get a pussy gland named after him, but there you have it). In the Orgasm stage, both the uterus and anal sphincter muscles contract , which, in turn, causes the vagina to contract. It is actually the process of those contractions that causes the Bartholin's glands to excrete a TON more fluid, as you observed.

How many orgasms can a woman have in a day?

Um, how much time do you have on your hands? Because really, the answer is A LOT.

See, this is one of those things that makes the female anatomy so incredible--while men have a refractory period following orgasm where they cannot get hard again (regardless of what you read in Fanfiction, by the way), women do not. We are physiologically able to be orgasmic immediately following an orgasm. In simple terms, that means that the female body is hardwired to be able to orgasm again and again and again. While the intensity of orgasms can diminish, you can keep at it all day long if you so choose, orgasming away. As I've often said, reading Fanfiction is akin to aerobic exercise--gets your heart racing, and keeps it racing. Somehow, I think if you mention to your partner that you'd like to make orgasming your new workout routine, you won't be getting any complaints.

There is a lot of peer pressure on losing your virginity. The older you get, the harder people press you to 'have fun' and 'experiment a little'. I myself am 20 years old, and all of my friends and even my family think I'm weird. How can you tell people that you don't want to have random mindless sex without sounding like a total fool?

Now that just makes me sad, sweets. I understand that there is pressure out there, but the bottom line is this: You are a strong, independent woman, and the only person who truly knows what's right for you is you. You most certainly aren't weird. I sense that people put pressure on you for different reasons. Some people enjoy having random mindless sex. Others probably want you to be able to experience how amazing it can feel to have sex. But you know what? Everyone is different. No one person's decision on when to initiate having sex is the absolute perfect way to experience your first time. Think about it--does every human learn to walk at exactly the same age? No. Do all women get their first period when they are 12? Nope. Does everyone get their first kiss at age 16? Nada. You get my point.


So, what do you say to the person who encourages you to 'have fun?' "My idea of fun is waiting to have sex with the right person, and I simply don't know who that is yet. Random mindless sex isn't my way to have fun." How about the 'experiment a little' crowd? "I fully intend to do that--once I've found the right person." My point is that every individual needs to decide what is right for them, and we really have no business judging other people's decisions that they make for themselves. If you stick to your conviction--tell people that it isn't right for you, and also that it is really none of their business--you will not sound foolish. Be confident in your choice, and let people know that it is not on the table for discussion, period.