Tuesday, January 25, 2011

The Lemon Report 1/25/11

The Lemon Report - Fancy finding out what is on the FF bookshelves of the Pervy Girls of the PPSS? The lemon report lets you know our personal favourite updates of the week, and why you should give the fic a try.... It’s a great place to trawl for new recc’s and don’t forget to share your favourite update with us by leaving us a comment.

Acronym Guide

AU - Alternate Universe
AH - All Human
WIP - Work in Progress
O/S - One Shot
OOC - Out of Character
WP - Wussperv
Slash/Femslash - Features homosexual characters and romance.

AH, O/S, Jake/Bella

Jeanne - I love finding fic on twitter. While I’m a fan of Jacob/Bella it is rare that I can find fic for that pairing that features the version of Jacob that I like. Namely, the cocky, muscle bound, smartass, bad boy that was waiting for Bella in the Forks High parking lot in New Moon, the book. The faithful, soft hearted boy trapped in the body of an aggressive, predatory man Kissa621 has captured that Jacob Black in her hot and sexy little one shot, Naughty Girl. Bella is the sweet, cheerleader and Jacob is the rough, bad boy in the delicious romp set in high school that will bring the perv out in even some of the most ardent WussPervs.

Special note: I just recent discovered that this is an AU outtake from kissa621’s mulitchapter WIP Bet on Me.

Jen - Jeanne emailed the link to this o/s one night after I’d gone to bed. I checked my phone when I opened my eyes the next morning and clickety-clicked the link right away. Holy effing hotness- that was a delightful wake-up read. Insanely hot, and definitely made me regret being a good girl in high school.

Chele - If you took only Jake’s passion for Bella and bold self-assuredness from canon, and then turned them into a sex fest, it would read just like this. Unf. I want to see a series of vignettes where they have sex in different places. This level of chemistry and intensity is too hot to be so tiny.

Jess - Like Jen, as soon as I saw this I clicked it open. I have become more and more interested in exploring what could have been with Jacob - regardless of whether Edward had ever been a part of her life - and this was a great segue into it! This Jacob is so freaking hot, and Bella is self-assured and while a bit timid about a quick romp in the lounge at school, she really, really gets into it... ifyouknowwhatImeanandIthinkyoudo! If you are interested in exploring this pairing... or if you already love these two together, give this one a go! Such great chemistry and unf-factor!

Kitty - OH! I’m with Chele, I would give my left tit to see this in a series. I feel so corrupted and dirty for reading this and loving the fuck out of it. Sweet baby JANE. Now THAT is the Jake that I can get on board with! I feel like I cheated on Edward because I didn’t think of him even once whilst reading. NOT EVEN ONCE. Jake was just so all encompassing and RAWR and just...just...living, breathing, sex in the flesh...GAH


Jen - This fab AU was mentioned recently on twitter. I checked it out and I was hooked from the first chapter. Edward refused to change Bella after they married. Canon Edward’s concern with her fragility and her soul, along with his need for control, are amplified in Eden Burning. All of these things have hurt their marriage to the point that Bella is left wondering whether or not their marriage can survive. NGL, kids, this is seriously angsty stuff. I enjoy all pairings but Saluki168 is definitely making my heart hurt each chapter. Fortunately the angst is tempered by extremely hot human/vamp sex, some of it in flashback and some angry sex in the present time. I don’t know how it’s going to turn out but this is a fantastic and under-appreciated fic worth checking out.

AH, Alice/Bella, WIP

Jen - Our heroines are reunited after a week apart. Bella can’t endure the trip back to Alice’s apartment without feeling Alice’s hands on her body, so they take a visit to the ladies room. Hot Bella-fucking ensues; who says slashy boys should be the only ones to enjoy public restroom fun?


Jen - Interns is the follow up to Age Gaps. Edward and Jasper were supporting characters in that drabble fic. Lucky for us Conversed & Lou_la decided to give the boys their own drabble fic. As Carlisle put it in Age Gaps “I wish they would just fuck already and get it out of their systems.” They are finally getting there, and they are adorable, ridiculous, and sexy all at once.

Emmy - - Woah! I love this fic. My only gripe is that as each update is devoured I want MOARRRR! Thank heavens they update so ruddy often then! :D I love, love, love reading their perceptions of each other and the different ways they see the same event. I adore them all randy and flustered in the office around one-another. I hadn’t been reading Age Gaps - guess what I am going to go read now? ;)

Carlise/Bella AH O/S

Chele - Oh holy hell. Bella is attending a bash at Professor Calisle Cullen’s house, and trying not to be seduced by him again. Thank god her efforts are total fail, because the resulting clash of heat and teeth and sex is panty-melting hot.
I had forgotten what a treasure trove of smut could be found in the Friday Free For All on Twilighted. Thanks to Miztrezboo's steaming smutfest, I’ll be checking back there more often.

Jen - Bella + Carlisle + Friday Free For All. What else is there to say, but UNF!

Bella/Paul AU WIP

Chele - In my head I have re-named this chapter: “In which Paul proves to be a cunning linguist.” I completely approve of his methods for ensuring that Bella knows he is there for her in every way. Unf. I can never get enough of this story. MeraNaamJoker is really doing something special here. If you’re looking for something refreshingly different, and packed with steaming intensity, read this RTFN.

Jeanne - FUUUUUUUCK! This artful weaving of canon, fic and raw emotional fucking makes leaves me breathless and aching for more. MeraNaamJoker knows how to write a fucking story, and it just gets better and better with each update. Paul and Bella’s relationship keeps getting more complex as time goes on. The depth, and maturity of their love is astounding, and makes me so afraid of all the obstacles they face in the future.

Jess - I have loved this story since I first started reading it. Paul is so freaking haaawwwwttt! Good lord, kill me now. Add in some Latin and you have an even hotter, yumtastic update. Read! Read! Read!

Jen - Paul recites some Latin to Bella. *Classics major faints from the unf of it all*

Teal - Reading this story has gotten to the point where I pull a chapter up on my phone when it updates and have to read it RTFN. I swear, I’ve even read while at work, hiding my phone in my lap beneath the desk and pretending to be productive. As always, my new favorite author didn’t fail to bring it good and steamy in this update. Paul is simply edible, and despite Bella’s angst in the most recent chapter, just his loving presence is enough to pull me through. RAWR.


Jess - This story has been my little pleasure for weeks. It updated VERY often, and tells the story of an overplanning Bella whose trying to turn over a new leaf and a manwhorish Edward that has been burned by love. Watching the chemistry between these two has been panty-blasting, and when they finally do the deed... like for real because they want to be together... Ded!

Oh... and what do you know, there’s an update today in mah box! WOOT!


Jess - I had the pleasure of spending a few days with Ro at the beach last year. She is an absolute dream to be around, and her stories are so real you feel, like you can relate in the most basic and itnense ways. Starry Eyed Inside, for me, is about loving, losing, moving on, and finding your way back to old flames in new ways. The lemon we finally got was so tastefully executed and left me swooning for more.

Teal - GUH. Edward and Bella are finally back together and getting somewhere. Not that I minded when Bella was with Garrett (UNF UNF UNF), or when Edward was wooing her again, but to have them back in a good place, where Ro makes everything so romantic and meaningful while also fuckhawt as hell is just sooooooo nice. I can never get enough!


Jess - I blame Chele for getting me hooked on Carlisle-Bella fics. This story has had me from chapter 1. Seeing the chemistry, the strong, the connection between these two is so indescribable. It’s visceral and achey and I just want more, more, more all the time! This update almost killed me dead from hotness. I adore dry humps, and sweet mother of mercy, it was sexy in every way. My one statement of warning for those of you that care, this story does revolve around themes of adultery, so if you have issues with that, this story probably isn’t for you.

Chele - I have been madly in love with this story from the moment I discovered it just one or two chapters in. Bella’s point of view in so full of passion and intensity, it gets me completely caught up in the moment. The UST has ben building, building, building as Carlisle and Bella fall deeper in love. Well, the UST has finally exploded. I am dead from the rubbing and the stroking and the words, all those beautiful words. I love, love love it. Falling in love with your dad’s best friend and committing adultery has never been so sexy. Ever. I’m not even kidding. So hot.

Jen - Making out and an almost-dry hump have never been so hot.


Emmy - I love Amethyst Jackson’s writing - especially when she writes AU, she deffo has a real knack for it. This is a lovely, and very short but delicious slice of VampWard and humanBella having some dry humpy fun. Good times abound as they push boundaries - and buttons...

Jess - Seeing this pop in my box was like getting a piece of chocolate after a long, hard (twss) day. And then... reading it... dry humps... unf!! My favorite line in this thing just says it all about Vampward and Bella: “On and on and on, I burned adrenaline and desire with each twist of my hips.” OH YES!

E/J AU Dark Slash OOC

Emmy - So first up - this LR is for a series of fics that IKG has posted - each one building on the experiences of the previous one-shot. Now - you should know that these fics are angsty, they feature both a DarkWard and a domineering DarkSper. I do NOT think there will be a happy ever after for these boys/vamps... What you do need to know however, is that these stories are very engaging. Edward is a very confused and conflicted vamp.. Wracked by guilt for turning away from the ‘vegetarian’ diet embraced by his family. Edward feels isolated and alone, enter Jasper. Jasper - controlling, dominant and fierce. He has plans to educate Edward in his carnal and primal ways.


Emmy - Who doesn’t love a geeky, tutorWard? Especially one who gets his glasses fucked off of him? **grins** College boy Edward is tutoring Jasper. Jasper seems cocky (!!), petulant and trouble to Edward. So why oh why can’t Edward get his mind off of Jasper’s other attributes? Great fun and yummo-delish.

E/B AH WIP Dark/Angsty OOC

Emmy - Woah. This is really not a WP safe story. Its sad, dark and angsty. But oh so very good. I am completely transfixed by it. Bella is highly flawed and vulnerable - we don’t yet know the source of the pain she is desperately trying to find an outlet (safe or otherwise) for.. Edward? Well he is fighting his own personal battles - especially the one to do with his obsession with Bella. Edward and Bella have a special game they like to play in bed. They have an amazing chemistry. They also have amazing sex - albeit with a dangerous edge and sex that Edward pays for. But jesus the sex scenes are erotic and their bond is beautifully written. Amazing writing from Blue has me captivated. I am always THRILLED to see an update of this fic!

Peter/Alec, AH, two-shot, slash

Teal - Did someone say, “GIMME MOAR PETER!”? Oh wait, that was me. That’s pretty much what I think/say/fantasize about every day, and the delightful and talented Lou-La heard my plea. Yes, I’m deluded enough to believe that all good Peter fic is actually written specifically for me (I may or may not be exaggerating, JS). Anyhoodle, in this smutful continuation of the original o/s Campfire in which Peter makes many wonderful observations about the tasty, twinky Alec and then does him dirty in the woods, this followup gives us Alec’s perspective on things after the fact. An impromptu meeting quickly turns to a hookup they’ve both been wanting, and it is DELISH. While the pairing is rather random, Lou-La makes it work. Maybe I can beg her to give up all other fic and just write Peter from now on... *makes irresistible puppy eyes at Lou-La*

Chele - I. Love. This. Pairing. Lou-La has me completely convinced with these two interludes that they were meant to be. The standing in the rain, the laundry commandment, the almost being caught. It was all so perfect together.
I hadn’t read the first installment of this delicious endeavor, despite my pervs telling me I would love. I was wrong, so very wrong to wait. However, when I read it this morning, I had the benefit of being able to read this update right on it’s tails, which means I got a double header of Peter/Alec slash and it completely satisfied my red-hot slash quota for today.


CharliDenae said...

Thanks so much for the pervy recc's! I can't wait to get reading... although, I should be writing... >_<

Jeanne said...

CharliDenae, I struggle with the same dilemma everyday. :)

I try to reward myself with smutty fic, once I've made my daily word count.

Good luck and thanks for reading.