Thursday, July 21, 2011

Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy


Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy is an advice column that addresses reader’s most burning questions on sexual health/relationships. STDs, birth control, is it real or is it fic, sexual positions--you name it. There are no stupid questions, only ones that are too embarrassing to ask someone you know. If Naughty Nurse Kimpy doesn’t know the answer, she’ll find an expert who does!


The information and advice from Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy is for entertainment/educational purposes only and is not intended to be used as expert medical advice. It is not meant to replace the advice of your physician. All medical advice and information should be considered to be incomplete without a physical exam, which is not possible without a visit to your doctor.

Naughty Nurse Kimpy loves her virginal readers and their many questions... while hymens are still the number one question, masturbation is a close second. To be fair, not every question she gets about masturbation is from a virgin, but there are still a lot of them out there.

Before launching into this week’s questions, however, Naughty Nurse Kimpy requests that you revisit her previous post on orgasms. It will go a long way to give you some great background information on how to achieve the Big O.

Is there are right way and a wrong way of masturbating? That's probably a stupid question...

For starters, the words stupid question have no place in an Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy post--let me make that perfectly clear.

If the end result of masturbation is to achieve an orgasm, then there is definitely a right way and a wrong way to masturbate. If you’re merely seeking pleasurable feelings or mild arousal, then it doesn’t much matter what you do. I think the most important piece of advice I can give you is that if whatever you’re doing doesn’t feel good, then don’t do it.

I sense that you’re asking the question because you haven’t masturbated, and you’re looking for ways to achieve an orgasm. For more details on that, please refer to the link above; the Big O post goes into explicit detail on how to best achieve an orgasm when going at it solo.

Naughty Nurse Kimpy is also going to emphasize that if you think of masturbation in terms of right and wrong, then your brain is probably going to mess with your mojo, making it more difficult for you to achieve your goals (i.e., The Big O Felt All The Way to China). Just relax and enjoy yourself, regardless of the outcome. As Woody Allen once said, “Don’t knock masturbation; it’s sex with someone I love.” KWIM?

Does masturbating makes it harder for you to achieve an orgasm with a partner?

There are two answers to your question, and they are conditional. In general, masturbating doesn’t make it harder for you to achieve an orgasm with your partner, but it does train your brain to expect orgasms via direct clitoral stimulation. That’s not bad, it just means that you might have to either work a little bit harder when you’re with a partner, or continue to stimulate your clit during sex (or have your partner do it for you).

The other answer to your question deals with frequency of orgasms. If you get off on your own frequently and regularly, that makes it harder to achieve an orgasm the next time. You can still get the Big O, it just takes a little bit longer, and it can be less intense. In general, the longer you wait between orgasms, the more intense they are.

Okay this realllyyy embarrassing but when I masturbate I sometimes pass gas. I'm still a virgin but my hymen is already broken. So my question is, is it abnormal for that to happen? Is there some way to stop it from happening?

It’s not abnormal for this to happen, actually. When you masturbate or have sex, you stimulate a process which combines muscle tension and relaxation in your pelvic region. What is most likely happening for you is that the muscles controlling your sphincter are relaxing, which allows gas to escape. When you experience an orgasm, there is a rhythmic contraction of those same muscles which can force out excess gas and/or air.

See the second part of the All About Masturbation next week on Ask Naughty Nurse Kimpy.

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