Tuesday, June 21, 2011

The Lemon Report 6/21/11

The Lemon Report - Fancy finding out what is on the FF bookshelves of the Pervy Girls of the PPSS? The lemon report lets you know our personal favourite updates of the week, and why you should give the fic a try.... It’s a great place to trawl for new recc’s and don’t forget to share your favourite update with us by leaving us a comment.

In some cases, the Lemon Report may contain spoilers. Please read with caution.

Acronym Guide
AU - Alternate Universe
AH - All Human
WIP - Work in Progress
O/S - One Shot
OOC - Out of Character
WP - Wussperv
Slash/Femslash - Features homosexual characters and romance.


Emmy - I CANNOT tell you how thrilled I am to be able to put this on The Lemon Report. I was seriously happy to read this update, it’s always a priority when it arrives in my box, but this was serious squee happy. I love this story, love how its written. Love the chemistry and the characters. But oh my word I loved this chapter. Finally Edward. Finally...

Jen - *squeeee* Like Emmy, I’m so excited about this chapter. I love seeing this unfold through Mr.Masen’s eyes, complete with his awkward rambling--yes, he even rambles in thought. But that’s ok, because Bella is also incapable of reining in her mental filter, and these two are just perfect together.

Liz - I love his dopey ramblings, her backbone, and the image of him apologizing and letting the moment - and that KISS! - sweep them away.

Jess - SQUEEE! That’s how I felt after reading this chapter! It’s not perfect; they still have to work through some stuff, but sweet mercy... love, love, love these two!

AH, WIP, Edward/Jasper

Jess - It took me a while to wade through this *ahem* long update, but it was so worth it. There was so much insight into what was really going with Edward. And then the meadow -- first post-accident BJ, dildos... and *gasp* and important surprise... and cliffie!! LOVE these boys.


Jess - I’ve loved this story since Emmy first mentioned it to us Wusspervs. This chapter was full of so much goodness. All I’m going to say here is wild, raw sex... to heal a broken heart and to make a girl realize she’s her own person. UNF!

Emmy - I ADORE this fic. This chapter? Killed me in all the right ways. A top-notch fic! LOVE it.

Trin - HOT HOT HOT! This update was fantastic and as Jess said the realization she has was so nice to see.

AU, O/S, Carlisle/Bella

Chele - This is a bit of an outtake/o/s continuation from One Weekend, which is an amazing Carlisle/Bella Fic. Though you do not have to have read that story to enjoy this little stand alone smuttake.

Jeanne - Well fuck me running this is a hot and adorable little outtake. StormDragonfly seduced me into giving her full story a try. The playful banter and mindblowing sex knocked me on my ass.

Jen - unffffff. That is all.

AH, O/S, Jacob/Angela

Jeanne - You know me and my love for non-canon pairings. I discovered this pretty piece of heartfail while doing a fic dive, and OMG am I glad I did. Honestly, even I hadn’t thought of this pairing, but I love, Love, LOVE them together. Be warned, I meant it when I said heartfail, but with the cool salve of mutual masturbation it hurts so good.

Jess - ::SOB:: This story pretty much broke my heart, but in all the right ways... if that’s even possible. The writing and emotion are so palpable, and the regret... there are no words for Jacob’s regret. A little making out in the water.... unf though, and that definitely helped soften the blow.

X-Men: First Class Movieverse, O/S, Slash, Charles/Erik

Jeanne -If you’ve seen X-men: First Class you got to see some prime fucking slashy subtext between the two founding fathers of the X-men universe. Many of us old school fans are familiar with the pairing of Charles and Erik, but the beauty of new movies like this is that now we get to envision the sex-o-licious James McAvoy and Michael Fassbender doing the nasty.

This all to short one shot encapsulates the seething sexual tension that was coming off that movie screen in waves. It captures the morning after these two men act on their mutual attraction and discover a very deep, emotional connection. This fic isn’t just a smutty little morsel, it’s like someone painted the Mona Lisa with naked men and butt sex. Don’t believe me? Read it for yourself.

AU, O/S, Jacob/Leah

Jeanne - I would like to just state for the record that EMMY rec’d this fic to me. That’s right the original WussPerv rec’d me a non-canon pairing fic. O.O But I am so glad she did, cause this steamy, angsty one shot knocked me on my ass. It is so flawlessly executed that I could see it happening in canon. A secret that neither of these tortured souls would share with anyone else, including their pack members. I’m so happy I got to read it...and reread it. heh

Jess - Like Jeanne, I read this after Emmy rec’d it. I have found this love deep inside for Leah. And like in most fic, her story is just devastatingly sad. I hurt for the pain she felt at rejection after rejection... and yet, in the midst of it, we get some steamy, needy, raw lovin’. So so good!

Emmy-I am not sure how I stumbled upon this. But its perfection. Made my heart clench with pain for them both. But so realistic and so much genuine emotion and sentiment. Could so easily be a missing moment from canon. I doubt the author will ever revisit it, but it is ripe for another chapter or two.

AH, O/S, Historical, Flangst, E/B

Emmy - This one-shot was recc’d on twitter (can’t rem who! Sorry but thank-you!). Its an easy and romantic read. Set in a Tudor’s-esque time and place. With a bitchy Queen Jane and a randy Kind Edward. Fresh-faced and younger cousin of the Queen, Lady Isabella presents a challenge for the sexual King. Could it be more, or if Bella gives in to the lust will the King lose interest? A light read, choc-a-bloc with sexual tension!

AH, WIP, Ed/Leah

Jeanne - This update nearly killed me. Not only does the emotional intensity between Edward and Leah keep building, and we also get more sexy times. Oh holy humping elephants, what a sexy fucking time it is! I have three words for you...Edward. Goes. Down. *THUD*

Jen - IdPattThat joked on twitter that she couldn’t stop these two from fucking even when she didn’t intend to have a lemon in the chapter. I don’t know if she meant this chapter or not, but lemons aside, it is so amazing watching these two develop as a couple. Leah doesn’t see herself clearly; my heart practically bursts with pride as she solidifies her place as the person who centers Edward. Gorgeous and sexy in every last word.

Jess - I echo what Jen and Jeanne have both said. Deep down in my gut I just keep waiting for the shoe to drop, and I so hope it doesn’t... because I’m not sure it really has to. This story, to me, is really about Leah figuring out who she is and changing her self perception and getting over her fears. Pastorward has been in lock step with her every step of the way... and good lord... the going down just about killed me dead.

Chele - I swoon over this story. Ridiculous, adorable swoon. This chapter is no exception. Divine.

Liz - These two are so perfect together, and I can’t think of many other fic Edwards this perfect.

AH, Complete, Jasper/Peter, Slash

Jen - I’m so thankful Emmy told us about this story in the LR a few weeks ago. Venice Beach Stories is a series of vignettes focused on different couples who are loosely tied together: Edward & Bella, Paul & Rachel, and in this final installment, Jasper & Peter. This is an amazing o/s which could totally stand on its own--for both the sexual content as well as rich character development.. Hot as hell, but also a wonderful look at Jasper as he figures out exactly who he is.

Emmy - Oh. My. Word! Jasper and Peter. Angsty. Sweet. Angsty. Sexy. Need I say more? If so, its beautifully written, completely convincing and totally heartfelt. This fic needs more than 267 reviews. Its an AMAZING collection of stories. A mix of canon and non-canon. Each captivating. This slashy addition is wow.


Jess - I wasn’t able to join in Trin’s Talk Nerdy post when this story was originally rec’d, but in true form, I jumped right on this. There is so much goodness in this story, and I am seriously addicted. Like need more right the freak now. The latest update had a very, very hot wank scene where Edward’s imagining his very own Catwoman - aka Bella in black yoga pants. Sweet mercy... just about killed me dead.

Jeanne - I have this fic on alert (as you should too) so I can read it despite my vow to be non-canon for this month. I am so glad that I got to read this update. Fuck do I love when Edward’s masturbates, his fantasies aren’t just creative and hot. I love that he sees her curves part of her sex appeal, which is rare in fan fiction. This story has got me by the throat, I am dying for the next chapter.

Trin - I am falling so fucking hard for AnimatorWard. Like Jeanne said his utter appreciation for Bella's curvy body just warms my heart, but his sweetness is what has captured me. Holy hot hand pumping, Batman, the yoga pants wank was so unffffff!

Liz - I’m not sure what was hotter, the yoga-pants wank, him telling her to wear them more often, or their good night kiss.....

AU, O/S, Ed&Bella+Jake

Jeanne - Ed/Bella/Jake is my OT3 (One True Threesome). I love the idea of this simple yet awesome solution to all the romantic conflict in canon. Here we have a beautifully written one shot that demonstrates in a very believable fashion how it could happen. This is Fire &Ice (aka Vamp and Wolf) sex at it’s finest with all the lovely erotic possibilities of contrasting temperatures and special powers. Please note: I listed the pairing or rather the threesome in a very specific way for a reason. Even if you are unsure about poly or threesome fics you should give this a try. It is sexy, beautiful and even a little romantic.

Chele - Bravo. Thank fuck someone was willing to do this take on AU and do it right. Sexy and simply beautiful.

Jen - So glad Jeanne came across this. Just delicious.

AH, WIP, Slash, Edward/Jasper (with others as well)

Jen - Shoefreak37 does an amazing job with this chapter of this round-robin slash fic. I’m sure not all readers of the fic will be happy with the sexual partner Edward had this chapter. I however am quite happy and extremely satisfied. UNF!

Liz - I’ve almost reached a point in this story where I don’t care who the final pairing is, cuz every chapter with each new twist and turn is better than the last. This chapter? OMFG.

AH O/S Edward/Rosalie

Jess - I wasn’t originally going to read this when the girls started talking about it, but with each subsequent email, I found myself being pulled to it. I’m rarely a fan of E/R fics. I’m not even sure why... and then add on that they are second cousins... well, you can see my initial hesitation. However, and this is a BIG however, the minute I started reading it, I was completely sucked in. LuckyStar815’s writing is absolutely beautiful. I felt like I was in this story, watching and waiting, pulling and hoping for something between these two... and when it finally happens, slowly but surely, you can’t help but fall in love. The ending left my heart wide open and bleeding with loss... and with so many questions... I LOVED this!

Jeanne - This isn’t the usual story that I read. The idea made me leery, but I decided to give it a shot and I am so glad I did. LuckyStar815’s writing is fabulous. Her ability to tell this story in a sympathetic light is a gift. Through the course of the story not only did I grow to love both Edward and Rose’s friendship, I came to hope for a HEA for them. The end left me aching and yet still hopeful, then again I’m a bit of hopeless romantic.

Teal - I adore Lucky so very much, and this one-shot is another wonderful testament to her stellar writing. Though heartbreaking in so many ways, it’s a beautiful portrayal of the struggles of just being a teenager and how those years are made all the more difficult by loss, heartbreak, and trying to find acceptance. Feelings and romance can be blindsiding, and that’s exactly what happens here. Though taboo and angsty, Lucky really made this work.

Liz - This was a beautifully put together piece that left me in tears, but it hurts so good. So real and believable, and so perfectly captures the desperate feelings of first love.

AH WIP E/J Slash

Jess - This story so owns me. I practically live for the every other Sunday updates... and thank the lord it came a day early. We are down to the wire with this one with just one chapter and an epi to go. This was probably the hardest chapter to read; I mean it was physically painful to feel the utter hopelessness and sorrow and brokenheartedness roll off Jasper. But there was sooooo much good in there to - Riley, Peter... The lemons in this chapter were absolutely fantastic, but I’m not gonna lie, they left me feeling ragey and emo and confused. Please to be posting the next update early, Touchstone67. My little Wussperv heart can’t take the anticipation!! Please... I’ll make you cupcakes... anything!

Emmy - This wussperv is having to read through eyes shut and covered. Breaking. My. Heart.

Liz - I can’t.... *sobbing*

AH, Drabbles, Complete, Slash, Riley/James

Emmy - I just loved this story. It was sexy and it was fun. It was a breezy, easy read that always put a big smile on my face, and a wee tingle in me bits. I love this pairing and their sexy banter and shenanigans. I also love the wee hints under the surface of more to their tale. Great fic.

Jen - I adore Riley and James, Punk and Perv respectively, as imagined by Conversed and TruceOver -- the lovely duo united under the penname Punk and Perv. There’s just something about Punk’s voice that I love so damn much--he’s just so naughty and fun. I’ve been dying for Perv to bend Punk over the Chief’s squad car (there may have been twitter begging) for a long time, and I was not disappointed with the results!

AH, Extended One-Shot, SLASH, Edward/Jasper

Emmy -I was chuffed to see that vampireisthenewblack had extended this one-shot about these two horny and terribly confused teens. I love how they think the other is full of hate for them. When in fact they are full of lust (oh and come!) for t’other....


Teal - *dies* Sweet mercy, the lemon in this chapter killed me. Short and sweet as it was, it took the breath out of me. Things are really changing for these two, and after many inner conflicts over his feelings, I’m anxious to see how Edward handles everything from here!

Emmy - I know we keep reccing this every week. But really, its so gooooood. Edward is just adorable in a lost kind of way, and I love how things are progressing. With only having E’s POV Bella is a closed book with only wee hints. Gah. Great fic.


Anonymous said...

Love all your recs this week, but I can't agree with your one of M & A. I, like Emmy, had my eyes shut and skimmed over the lemons in this weeks update. That story is just getting ridiculous at this point with the angst and the poor decisions of it's characters.

Also, Big Gay Story, at this point I don't care who they end up with either since I care nothing for the characters. Since chapter 9 that story has just been chapter after chapter of contempt and hate between the two who the story is supposed to be about. It's so sad that all these talented authors weren't able to give us a story that we would cherish and want to reread over and over. Instead we end up with a story where E and J aren't together for the majority of it, and we have to read about them constantly being with other people. Just my opinion, but no thanks!

Jessypt said...

Dear Anon,

Thanks for checking out the LR this week! There were some great updates in there.

I wanted to take a minute to respond to the comment you posted regarding Mergers and Acquisitions and Big Gay Story. With respect to M&A, first, I couldn't disagree with you more. I feel the story, while long, has been as realistic as possible. Was this chapter hard to read? Absolutely, especially for a Wussperv like me. It was painful to see Peter and Jasper be together, but in my mind there are so many extenuating circumstances, that it just sort of worked. I'd also like to point out that Jasper is very young, has lives an extremely jaded life, and definitely doesn't always make great decisions. I think what we can probably agree on is that he is doing his best with what he's got and that his intentions, as misguided as they might be, are good. I realize it won't work for everyone, but Touchstone67 has poured her heart and soul into it. I think as both a reader and a writer, we should extend her the courtesy and good will as she shares her words with us.

As far as Big Gay Story, I'll simply say, I haven't read it. The premise, however, is that 30 authors in 30 chapters would write a story independent of one another with very few stipulations. From that, you get a story that is creative and unplanned. To me, it's a fun exercise in continuity that takes balls (or vaginas) and effort to share.

These are just my random musings. Thanks so much for supporting The PPSS!

Anonymous said...

Thanks for your thoughts on the two stories I commented on. I was surprised that you said that M&A is realistic. I find that it's very hard to read something where the actions of the main characters make no sense whatsoever. Jasper is supposed to have this soul mate type love with Edward but he turns his back on him to stay with Riley. He makes no attempt to contact him and shacks up and has sex with Peter for two months. That doesn't sound like love to me. I understand he is young and makes bad decisions, but at this point what more can he do to push Edward away? How will Edward ever be able to trust this so called "love" when Jasper has done nothing but put two other men ahead of Edward at every turn? It will be interesting to see how TS writes this final chapter in a believable way. I can't imagine how she's going to show Edward letting Jasper back into his life after the things he has done. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. It's always nice to get an opinion from another pov.

Anonymous said...

I can't believe my story made it on here. I'm really shocked and honored.

Thanks for making me smile!

Water and Regret